Word of the Gay

*Straight talk on Gay language, one word at-a-time.

#39 “kai kai”

We seem to be on a drag-related streak here on Word of the Gay, one that’s lasted almost an entire year since our last post in June of 2011. With the season finale of RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 4 (nearly) behind us, we were inspired by cast member Sharon Needles and her boyfriend Alaska (who is also a drag queen) to post this definition.

“Kai kai” [rhymes with “eye eye”] refers to when two drag queens engage in sexual activity or “hook up”.  The term most likely derives from the American slang term “ki ki” [pronounced “kee kee”], which is a general term used when gay men laugh, giggle or joke around with one another.  The contemporary use of “kiki” as it relates to humor may originate with the French translation, meaning “to choke” or “to throttle.”  Possibly related: many drag queens also use the term “gag” or “gagging” when something excites, impresses or overwhelms them.  The term “kiki” may also relate to the drag & ball scene when young people take part in an event called a “Kiki Ball.” Essentially, kai kai, kiki (along with their multiple iterations and uses) will often describe the interaction between drag queens, performers and/or gay men.

You may hear drag queens speak disparagingly about kai kai, or make jokes about other drag queens hooking up or having sex with each other.


1. the act of two drag queens having sexual relations; i.e. “hooking up” or entering into an intimate or sexual relationship.

Related: ki ki, kai kai’d

Ex: “So did you and that other drag queen kai kai?”

Ex: “I never thought that those two would ever kai kai, but they both disappeared after the show.”

[Origin: Most likely American. Current usage; drag queens and other people involved in the nightlife entertainment industry.]



[…] Drag Race breakout star Willam teamed up with drag bestie Rhea Litre and hottie model-musician Mike Munich for a tongue-in-cheek (and elsewhere) cover of Scissor Sisters’ “Let’s Have a Kiki.” This time, though, its all about kaikai. […]

  joshiku wrote @

thanks for reading!

  kai-kai wrote @

Kai kai comes from LGBTQ slang from the 20’s. Back then, lines between drag queens and trans people where not as clear as they are now and the term applied to both,meaning two trans people or drag queens. It’s still used today within the trans community, though not as much as in the drag queen community. Ki Ki is completely unrelated to kai kai, and is a much newer term. Ki ki derives from ki ki-ing and it used to mean laughing (as in a high pitch, overtly feminine laugh). Hope that helps 🙂

  lol wrote @

kai kai macht hau hau

  lol wrote @

kai rubbelt gerne an schwänze

  Benedetta Aleotti wrote @

Hi! Translating to Italian a jack London’s book, I found the word “kai-kai”,, with the same meaning, spoken in a partcular dialect, the beche-de-mer, which was the common language spoken in the Souther Seas. The book is written in 1917, so this could be an old English word! 🙂

  joshiku wrote @

cool find!

  Lorretta Keeman wrote @

Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive read anything like this just before. So nice to get somebody with original ideas on this subject. realy thanks for starting this up. this amazing site is one thing that is needed on the internet, a person with a little originality. helpful project for bringing something totally new to your world wide web!

  joshiku wrote @


[…] witticisms and “no-you-didn’t” style backchat that’s become legendary. From ‘kai-kai’ and ‘what’s the T?’, to ‘throwing shade’, the show and its cult following of ardent […]

  joshiku wrote @

thanks for linking us to your article!

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