Word of the Gay

*Straight talk on Gay language, one word at-a-time.

#10 “top”

Navigating the sexual playing field is a bit more complicated for gay people than our straight counterparts. We have to define our sexual roles in different ways due to the fact that our sexual partners have the same set of “equipment” as we do. Inserting tab “A” into slot “B” does not apply. So, we make use of slots “C” and “D” quite a bit more – and it’s oh, so fun!

In gay culture, the term “top” refers to people who are the dominant, or active person in the sack.

-noun
1. an individual who penetrates, or takes an active role during sexual activity
2. the perceived dominant individual in a relationship or sexual encounter
3. in the S&M and leather community; an individual who takes a dominant role or “charge” and identifies as a sadist, dom, domme, or dominatrix

-verb
1. the act of taking an active role during sexual activity (topping, tops, topped)

-advjective
1. to be bossy or take charge in a given situation

:”I am a Top.”
:”I am interested in guys who are strictly into topping.”

Reference: Ramon Johnson has a great entry on his About.com profile dedicated to the different labels gay men assume when describing themselves sexually.

[Synonyms: active partner, active, ass-bandit, back-door man, booty bandit, bugger, butt pirate, dom, domme, dominatrix, giver, master, pitch, pitcher, top man]

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