Word of the Gay
*Straight talk on Gay language, one day at-a-time.Archive for March, 2008
#15 “mince”
Traditionally, “mince” is a term used to describe cutting things into tiny pieces, or that tasty mixture of chopped dried fruit, distilled spirits and spices, and sometimes beef, suet or venison. In gay terms, it can be described similarly, as a mixture of coiffed aged fruit, distilled in spirits and silibate “S’s,” and sometimes a bit of meat.
“Mincing” describes actions that a man (gay or straight) might make which appear to be odd or even give the impression of femininity or effeminence. Most likely derived from “mincing;” the act of cutting items into small pieces – the phrase came to be synonymous with taking small, dainty steps or speaking in an overly dainty or elegant manner.
–adjective
1. having an effeminate or feminine appearance, position or attitude: a mincing walk.
2. (of the gait, speech, behavior, etc.) affectedly dainty, nice, or elegant. Courtesy of: Dictionary.com
–verb (used without object)
1. (of a person) to be in an effeminate or feminine position: to mince around.
2. to speak with an affected elegance or pretense.
: “Look at him mincing down the street!”
Related: mince, mincer, mincing, minced, minces
[Origin: unknown; may be attributed to the act of mincing (cutting objects into tiny, dainty pieces).]
#14 “dykin’ out”
Similar in many ways to “queening out,” “dykin’ out” refers to women exhibiting stereotypical gay traits or mannerisms. Commonly used to describe an instance when a straight woman experiments with lesbian sex, or when two straight women share intimate moments together.
This term is used primarily by gay men or straight women in a flippant manner, and is most often uttered to solicit a laugh.
#13 “queening out”
You’ve seen it all before… a gay man gets upset or super excited – and suddenly it’s the end of the World. “Queening out” is a popular phrase in the gay community that describes one of two things:
1. a gay male tantrum, or fit of rage
2. an individual exhibiting stereotypical gay tendencies; usually manifest in the form of speech patterns, mimicry of pop culture icons or outlandish dance & movement
The phrase is related to “queen” being a term used to describe an effeminate gay man. “Queening out” is not only used to describe men, but can be used for women, as seen in one of these two videos scenes from YouTube.com: Some Kid Queening Out & Child Abuser Queening Out
Ex: “Oh Gurl, you should have seen her, she was queening out on the dance floor big-time!”
[Related catch-phrases: "Slow Your Roll," "Don't have a cow, man" "Take it Easy," and the less-accepted "Fagging Out"]
#12: “versatile”
Guys who are versatile really like to do it all… they are the sexual OCD or bi-polar of the gay community. They are both active and passive, dominant and submissive, top and bottom.
[Syn: Vers, VERS, VRS, flip, flip-flop]
#11 “bottom”
Newton’s third law, the law of Reciprocal Actions, states that: “For every force there is an equal, but opposite, force.” This is one of three basic physical laws he used to describe motion and the basic principals by which we have come to understand the relationships between the forces of nature that act upon the body and the motion of the body itself.
In gay culture, it can be pretty cut-and-dry: for every “top” there is a “bottom.”
“Bottoms” enjoy being on the receiving end of sexual activity and are thought to be the submissive individual in the relationship. In gay male relationships, many straight people often refer to the “wife” of the couple, or the partner who is more feminine or submissive.
-noun
1. an individual who is penetrated, or takes a passive role during sexual activity
2. the perceived submissive individual in a relationship or sexual encounter
3. in the S&M and leather community; an individual who takes a submissive role or “submits” and identifies as a masochist, fem, femme, or slave
-verb
1. the act of taking a submissive role during sexual activity (bottoming, bottoms, bottomed)
-advjective
1. to be submissive or take orders in a given situation
2. “bossy” bottom can refer to an individual who takes a passive role in the sex act, but who has an assertive or dominant personality
:”I am a Bottom.”
:”I am interested in guys who want to bottom.”
#10 “top”
Navigating the sexual playing field is a bit more complicated for gay people than our straight counterparts. We have to define our sexual roles in different ways due to the fact that our sexual partners have the same set of “equipment” as we do. Inserting tab “A” into slot “B” does not apply. So, we make use of slots “C” and “D” quite a bit more – and it’s oh, so fun!
In gay culture, the term “top” refers to people who are the dominant, or active person in the sack.
-noun
1. an individual who penetrates, or takes an active role during sexual activity
2. the perceived dominant individual in a relationship or sexual encounter
3. in the S&M and leather community; an individual who takes a dominant role or “charge” and identifies as a sadist, dom, domme, or dominatrix
-verb
1. the act of taking an active role during sexual activity (topping, tops, topped)
-advjective
1. to be bossy or take charge in a given situation
:”I am a Top.”
:”I am interested in guys who are strictly into topping.”
Reference: Ramon Johnson has a great entry on his About.com profile dedicated to the different labels gay men assume when describing themselves sexually.
[Synonyms: active partner, active, ass-bandit, back-door man, booty bandit, bugger, butt pirate, dom, domme, dominatrix, giver, master, pitch, pitcher, top man]
#9 “Tina”
When it comes to thinking up catchy phrases and nicknames for illicit drugs, no one does it better than gay men. The term “Tina,” or “Teena” is widely used in gay communities as the casual or street term for crystal methamphetamine.
The name derived from the fact that the drug is commonly bought in sixteenth of an ounce packages; known as a “teena.” The name has also been attributed to the Western female name, Christina, which sounds similar to part of the drugs name, “crystal.”
[Origin: Most likely American, either San Francisco or New York City. The phrase was popularized by men frequenting online dating sites in the late 1990s and early 2000s.]
For a comprehensive list of Methamphetamine slang terms, visit KCI: The Anti-Meth Site. Many LGBT, HIV/AIDS and anti-drug organizations have focused on this particular drug in the past ten years for being so closely linked with the increase in HIV infection rates among young men. “Hurricane Tina” was a successful ad campaign and program launched by Gay Men’s Health Crisis in New York City in 2007 to spread awareness of this troubling trend.
#8 “bent”
The British truly have a way with words. They also have a certain way with homophobia. Being “bent” refers to anything that is gay… and in essence, isn’t straight. It is derived, most un-remarkably, from the word bent being a simple antonym to the word straight. However gauche, this phrase is wildly popular and has many derivatives. For instance, it can be used to describe any person, place, thing or activity that is perceived to be gay.
[Origin: British; alternatives: bent, bender]
Derogative in nature, “bent” should be used sparingly. In the US, Canada and Australia, the term is more often used as an alternative to the adjective “fuck” in the following phrase: “Get bent!”
- adjective
1. a derogatory term used to describe homosexual men
Person 1: “He’s a little bent, don’t you think?” / Person 2: “Yeah, he’s a right bender.”
#7 “breeder”
“Breeder” is a slang term that gay people use when describing straight people in either a derogatory or humorous manner. It is drawn from animal husbandry; implying that heterosexual sexual contact has more to do with reproduction than anything else.
-noun
1. a derogatory term used to describe straight people in light of their ability to reproduce
: “Look at this place. It used to be so cool, and now it’s filled with a bunch of breeders.”
#6 “gurrrl”
“What’d she say?! Well let me tell you…”
Some gay men use the word “gurrrl” as a way to reiterate something that they have just said. Or rather, as either an exclamation on its own, or as a way to address someone (usually another gay man). It is best received when shouted or said with a gravelly and/or affected accent. It has been co-opted by mainstream society as a way of stereotyping perceived gay or African-American speech patterns.
Example:
“Gurrrl, I sure am hungry!!!”
- pronoun
1. referring to a male or female acquaintance or peer
2. used to address someone in a frank, sarcastic or humorous manner
- interjection
1. an exclamation used to address a peer in a dramatic or humorous manner
2. a phrase used to add extra emphasis
[Origin: Closely associated with and accredited to African-American and gay slang of the 1990s.]
Related:
1. riot grrrl: A grassroots third wave feminist movement deeply connected to the punk rock scene in the early to mid 1990’s. Mostly youth-oriented, riot grrrl was neither an organization or a specific thought, but instead thrived on non-hierarchal “chapters” set up across America and parts of Europe connecting mostly young women with music, a thriving “zine” scene, and direct political action. (courtesy of: urbandictionary.com)
#5 “Mnh-hnhmmm”
Gay men say some pretty outrageous things. So it’s only natural that you might not believe what comes out of their mouths. Likewise, gay people have a lot of attitude, and might not believe everything that comes out of yours.
If you are in need of a sassy retort to your homo-amigo’s unbelievable ramblings, why not try the following: “Mnh-hnhmmm!”
“Mnh-hnhmmm” most likely derived from the affirmative response, “Uh-huh” and is most often used with sarcasm to denote an air of disbelief. The phrase has been popularized by teenagers, and may also be accredited to African-American slang popularized by women and gay men for many decades.
Nowadays, you will find that you hear more sassy young white gay men and older Afircan-American woman using this phrase.
- interjection
1. used to indicate disbelief or disapproval
2. sarcastic remark used in a mocking or sarcastic manner
Example 1
Person 1: “Seriously, I’m not really that into him.”
Person 2: “Mnh-hnhmmm…”
Synonyms: yeah right, whatever, oh p’shaw, okay, uh-huh
#4 “fierce”
Catch-phrases come and go in the gay community, but some truly stand the test of time. They’re “fierce!” The term “fierce” came into wide popularity among gay men in the ball culture scene of New York City during the late 1980s, and has since crossed-over into mainstream culture to become one of the widest-used adjectives we queens utter today.
In fact, you might have seen a recent episode of Project Runway Season 4, where one of the show’s finalists, Christian Siriano, said “fierce” at least twenty times in the course of one 42-minute episode. But the term is no longer used explicitly by gay men. Yours truly has heard more than a few straight women, and even straight men and lesbians, describe something as “fierce” on the streets of New York City.
- adjective
1. A term that gay men use to describe absolutely everything that is of “exceptional quality.”
2. A term used to describe objects, people, or instances that are outlandish and cannot be handled with subtlety; often with great or animated emphasis.
3. A term coined by African-American gay men to describe things are extraordinary, in either a positive or negative way.
-verb
1. The act of being bold, displaying confidence, creativity or self-reliance. Relates directly to fashion, clothes, hair or makeup.
Example 1
Person 1: “How was the party girl?” / Person 2: “Girl, it was FIERCE!”
Example 2
Person 1: “Did you see Wanda’s shoes girl?!” / Person 2: “Yeah girl, those platforms were FIERCE!”
#3 “bear”
Contrary to popular belief (and to the advertising departments of today’s popular gay lifestyle magazines), gay men are not all six feet tall with chiseled features, six-packs, and underwear modeling careers. In fact, most gay men do not look like this and come in many shapes, colors, and sizes. Men who identify as “bears” are one of the many colors in the gay-leidoscope.
The “bear” is so-named for his bear-like appearance. He is usually burly or heavy-set, with a hairy body and some form of facial hair. They may also give the impression of being blue-collar or working-class. The concept of being a “bear” has gone through many permutations in recent decades, with debate about what it means, exactly, to be a bear. They are usually gay or bisexual men, but transgender men have also been known to identify with bear communities.
Since the late-eighties and early-nineties, there has been a lot of growth in the bear community. Bears are closely related to the leather and S&M scenes in many communities, and there are many bears who consider themselves “leather-bears.”
[Origin: San Francisco during the 1980s; as an outgrowth of the gay biker and leather communities. Created by men who felt excluded from mainstream gay culture and the "twink" ideal that it purported. Richard Bulger and Chris Nelson founded Bear Magazine in San Francisco in 1987. Their company, Brush Creek Media, trademarked the name "Bear" for a men's magazine in 1991.]
Today, the bear culture has permeated through the post-modern, cultural watershed with this fantastic blog.
#2 “twink”
Pretty, young fit gay men with blond hair seem to have it all, don’t they? An active sex life, the attention of many other gay men, and a busy social life. In gay society, men who look like this are called “twinks.” Commonly, the term is used to describe someone who is either in their late teens or early twenties, or at least appears to be.
The term was initially used to describe attractive, young, gay Caucasian men who have very little or no body hair and a lean build. Initially, the term also only referred to blonds, but has grown to be inclusive of other young men whose physical features closely match those described above, but are not blond or even Caucasian.
“Twink” can be used in a insulting manner and is commonly modified to be more descriptive, such as: femme twink, butch twink, jock twink, etc. As such, the term has become widely popular in the gay porn industry and is used when defining genres of film.
[Origin: Most likely makes reference to the Hostess Twinkie; the yellow, cream-filled, cylindrical snack cake.]
#1 “Mary”
Gay guys love addressing each other through the use of a female name. “Mary” is their favorite. If you hear a gay using a female name to address another man, he probably thinks that the other is: a) effeminate, b) outlandish, or c) both.
–noun
1. a feminine name used as a substitute for a gay man’s given name, used with affection, ridicule, or familiarity by another gay man
2. a popular greeting or salutation used by gay men to address other gay men they believe to be more effeminate.
: “Hey Mary, how’s it going?
: “Calm down, Mary!”
[Origin: unknown; may be attributed to the popular American actress Mary Tyler Moore.]
